My iPhone’s note program isn’t working, so this is the best place I could find to record & organize my thoughts.
Hanging out with Sarah seems like it might be the closest I could get to experiencing what it must be like for guys to interact with me. Sarah & I are both easily amused, with a low threshold for expressions of joy. We both laugh easily & often, as automatic as breathing. We’re both good listeners, attentive & present, & we listen in a way that makes the other person feel seen, & heard, & cared for. We intuitively leave them feeling as though they’re especially clever, & interesting, & funny, at least when they’re with us. But Sarah is sweeter, laughs even more easily, & can make me fall for all the same intuitive flirtation tactics I use with other people. It might sound manipulative, I don’t know, but I don’t think it is. Flirting & being friendly & attentive & laughing at stupid jokes allows me to enjoy conversations with almost anyone, & draw people out about the things that they’re the most passionate about, which always makes everything more interesting. & I make people feel good. What’s wrong with that? It’s practice for my eventual career as a courtesan 😉
…Wait, May is National Masturbation Month? That’s a thing? Ok, so it’s a actually been a thing since 1995, after Clinton fired Joycelyn Elders (Surgeon Gen) for saying masturbation is natural & awesome & should be taught in sex ed. Fuck Clinton. Just cause he masturbated into his interns & not with his hand doesn’t make him better than Elders. It makes him worse.